always on my walks

It seems to be all weather these days.

The downy flakes fall in heaps, but don't stick to the wet ground. I look down at my once pink moccasins that have turned a shade of gray. Hood falls over my eyes. "It is too big," I say. I take off my mitten and the biting cold stings a bit, but I am all warmth.

I can feel the stillness around me. The air is densely thick with anticipation and curiosity, but also a bit of uncertainty.
It has been for months now.
Can you hear the solitary breathing? It goes in and out. It gets heavier as I walk faster.
I pass by many people lost in their own thoughts and I am alone.

What is tomorrow's forecast? I wonder.
It's ready to change.

CHANGE.

One year. Three hundred and sixty five days, give or take a few.
It has brought me here. To this place.
Can you believe it?!

I am stronger. More capable, but . . .

was it enough? Do they know? Is it almost done?

It will never be done.

Mosiah 21: 13-14; 23:10

{catching snowflakes via here}

i have long hair

I love my walks.
I see the dirty pavement sprinkled with wet rain and I drink in the musty smell. Mmmm.
My thoughts ramble on and they are the deepest yearnings of my heart.
A bird chirping tells of things to come. "Cheer up my dear!" he sings, "spring is almost here."
A trumpet sounds and patriotic tunes fill my head.
I pause. I am thankful. I move on.

image found via google images. lovely.

Echinacea Plus

Sweet encouragement from my tea.
It always has the best things to tell me.


















Traditional Medicinals
Herbal Dietary Supplement

not real medicine, but a lifesaver :)
{throat coat is my all time fav}

Also visits from best friends with lovely news are the best!

p to the three

Something clicked!
Again. It's like a constant repeat of "AHA!" moments and being hit on the head with a soccer ball. Ouch, Duh.

It was always there but too easily forgotten between deadlines and stresses and projects and endless hellos/goodbyes/see ya laters.

It's funny how things like loneliness, little reunions, random moments of joy, notable developments, etc. can whip your world around and make you see what was going on in the back.

It's little moments like these where I get a glimpse into what its all about. I want to grab my journ and scribble furiously each word and thought as it comes to me.
Like Whoa!
But when journ is a few buildings, a downward ramp, and 2 blocks away I resort to a comp in the tec of the mckb (soon to be my new home).

Change is constant. It's something to rely on. It won't let you down.
Let's learn to embrace it. Welcome it. USE it. Develop it.

Yours,
Kenj

P.S. For now, I'm looking forward to a letter and LONG conversations of love and friendship soon to be! :)

P.P.S. Do not those little meringues look divine?!

waiting

A new wave of events.

The biting wind brushes against my cheek. I scrunch up my shoulders closer and hold onto that thought tighter.
Look up, close your eyes and just breath a deep sigh. Don't think for one moment; just soak it all up in every part of your existence.

You are a living, breathing human being
and in that instant: invincible, unwavering, determined.

Create your own reality! Do not let opportunities pass you by.

Weaving thoughts keep me distracted
and zee avi tells me to find another tree
and make the wind my friend.
so "i’ll just sing with the birds
they’ll tell me secrets of the world."




















Hebrews 6:10
"For God is not unrighteous to forget your work and labor of love, which ye have shewed toward his name, in that ye have ministered to the saints, and do minister"

real feedback

"It's terribly amusing, how many different climates of feeling one can go through in a day." ~ Anne Morrow Lindbergh

41:59
Duration of our reconnection.
We talked of happenings, thoughts, future, options, etc.
{D&C 4; 84:88}
to be continued . . .

Some are so sensitive to others
and I am thankful for that.
Can I be more like that?
I am trying.

Chicken tikka masala, good company with
talks of colors and personalities
"let's see our compatibility"

Spring has been calling me.
such a dreamer.
That outlet to express myself is sitting on my shelf
unused & getting dusty.
It's been calling me too.

"What we have loved
Others will love
And we will teach them how" ~ William Wordsworth

Don't just say "good," give real feedback.
What you teach is who you are.
"Keep working on . . . "
Hopes and dreams of how it will look:
Overwhelming & inspiring.

"I can choose to sit in perpetual sadness, immobilized by the gravity of my loss, or I can choose to rise from the pain and treasure the most precious gift I have--life itself." ~ Walter Anderson

and then there was a knock at my door . . .

:)

Bring it on world!

new obsession

Thank you Provo library for being so wonderful. I want to spend hours and hours within your wonderful halls and rooms and isles of bookshelves just reading all day. Thank you especially for the children's literature section where I can relive my childhood.

FREE books and movies! What a concept.

Also I love this video!
Did you know they shot 60,000 pictures for this?!